Remember there was almost another twilight book but someone leaked it so Stephanie Meyer refused to finish and I’m 98% sure it was Robert Pattinson and god bless him
that girl you just called a scene? she’s a god damn arms race.
im glad i dont have a thigh gap i almost dropped my phone into the toilet but i caught it with thunder and lightning
And God said unto Abraham, “Abraham.”
And Abraham replied, “What.”
God said to John, “Come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.
And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, “The one whom I kiss is the one you seek.”
To which they responded, “Gay.”
And thus, god made Eve. And she was bammin’ slammin’ bootylicious.
see you all in hell